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The Raffle - Visitor's Funny Poem

by Richard John Scarr
(East Sussex, Brighton, England)

Last week I came first in a raffle.
But I refused to accept the first prize.
I settled instead for second hand boots,
which happened to be the right size.

When my wife saw the boots she looked startled.
And she asked: "Where's the first prize you won?"
I explained I had turned down the first prize.
And I told her the deal that I'd done.

She replied: "At ten pounds a ticket.
You come home with scruffy old boots!"
So I said: "What possible use could we have,
for a Luxury Blue Divers Suit?"

At that she simply exploded.
And her next words I just can't repeat.
Then she said: "You stupid old duffer!
It was a Luxury Blue Divan Suite!"

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